Ex-lawyer turned relationship coach

What To Do If They Send You Mixed Signals

When it comes to relationships, we often act like gamblers. If we’ve had an incredible time with someone who suddenly decides to end things or grows distant, we tend to chase our losses. 

Because we sunk so much of our time and attention into this person, we don’t want to feel like our investment was a waste. So we double down and increase our efforts to regain what we once had, the attention of our beloved friend.

A rookie play. 

Instead of just losing our initial stakes, we now also risk losing more time going after this unavailable person. It might only cost you a few months. But if you don’t move on, pining over a lost love can just as easily cost you years.

Especially if the person you like so much keeps showing you small shreds of interest.

Now you’re playing a losing game.

Not only are you missing a committed relationship with the person you care about, you also can’t fall for someone else because their bits of attention are keeping you hooked.

So what do you do?

Give yourself a cutoff point. 

It’s okay to be optimistic and believe they’ll eventually turn around and give you the relationship you want, but only for a while. 

Once the deadline arrives, and they haven’t started treating you the way you want, you must cut off all ties.

No matter how upset that makes you feel.

Otherwise, it’s impossible to heal from your heartbreak. Because every time that person pops in and out of your life, your heart will break all over again.

Don’t spend the best years of your life waiting for someone who doesn’t realise how amazing you are. 

You deserve better.

P.S. Don’t mistake their sweet texts or phone calls as a sign they want to be with you. If they wanted to be with you, you’d have zero doubts about it because they’d actually be by your side.

By Jeroen Elsing
Ex-lawyer turned relationship coach