Ex-lawyer turned relationship coach

Why Your Life Isn’t Boring

Living a boring life doesn’t sound very appealing. In fact, it sounds like a waste. Many of us struggle to understand why someone would ever choose such a tedious existence willfully. 

Few of us don’t. Tedium is just something we got tangled up in as we grew into adults. 

We haven’t lost our childlike dreams. Most of us would jump at the opportunity to become rich, famous, or adventurers. 

But life typically isn’t that generous.

Instead, we’re stuck leading largely ordinary and uneventful lives. We spend most of our time in the same places, talking to the same people, doing the same chores, walking the same paths, eating the same foods, having the same kinds of sex, and sleeping in the same bed. 

Although excitement is what we’re after, the menu only seems to serve routine and drudgery.

So what should we do?

Use our boredom as a cue to pay closer attention. 

Sure, our lives may not be as exciting as they could be. But that doesn’t mean that nothing meaningful is happening. 

If we observed more carefully, we’d notice all kinds of pleasurable things. Such as the song of the robin that marks the start of the day, the smell of the blackthorn’s flowers in early spring, and the cracking and popping of icy reeds as they’re heated by the winter sun. 

These events may not sound particularly thrilling. And talking about these experiences definitely won’t earn us many Instagram likes or get our face on the cover of a magazine.

But they are deeply satisfying to witness. And that’s ultimately what we’re after, a rich, satisfactory life. Excitement and seeking praise from others (on social media) are just different options to achieve the same.

Plus, our newfound observational skills will make us much more interesting to be around. 

Instead of telling a friend that our trip to meet them was fine. We can share that our travels involved watching a seagull break open a clam, smelling freshly baked goods that reminded us of our grandma’s mince pies, and seeing the setting sun paint the clouds a beautiful mixture of pink, purple, and orange. 

The more we notice, the more rich our lives become. Sometimes to the point that others wish they could live such boring, introspective lives as us.

By Jeroen Elsing
Ex-lawyer turned relationship coach