Ex-lawyer turned relationship coach

Ending Procrastination Guilt

Pay attention to your daily practices and routines, and you’ll find out you’re wasting time. Lots of it. 

Instead of grinding away at your goals, you’re probably checking your phone, answering trivial emails, or staring into the fridge for the gazillionth time in hopes that the food Gods have finally put something good in there.

In short, you’re seeking distractions. (And possibly doing a poor job of stocking your refrigerator.)

And that’s… fine.

You can’t expect to spend every minute you have on the things you value. That’s impossible. Because doing important tasks is usually difficult. 

Just the idea of starting can make us feel anxious, bored, insecure, unpleasant, resentful or frustrated. Quite a cocktail.

So putting off tasks isn’t just a question of how to best manage your time, it’s a matter of regulating your emotions. 

We delay important tasks because it makes us feel better. At least, for a moment. Procrastination makes us feel rotten in the long-term because we’re consciously sabotaging our dreams.

It’s self-harm and we know it. 

The trouble is that the momentary relief of pushing aside the challenging thing feels so darn good.

So good in fact, that we’re likely to do it again. And again. And again. 

That’s why you can’t just snap out of it and stop procrastinating when you want to. It’s addictive. And sometimes it’s your body telling you to take a break.

Even if you’re blessed with monk-like zeal and a limitless supply of energy, you’ll still have to occasionally put a pin in your plans. After all, you can’t prepare for the unexpected

The flu, a new urgent work project, a broken sewage pipe, or a family emergency all don’t care about your goals. They’re selfish.

That’s why it’s impossible to be the master of your destiny, there’s always the chance something more pressing will push its way to the top of your to-do list.

And there hides the key to ending procrastination guilt: you’ll always be procrastinating in some way. 

No amount of digital minimalism, time blocking, or habit mastery will give you full control of your time.

That’s actually a blessing.

Because now you know nobody is getting all the things done they want to. Everyone feels behind.

So don’t try to end procrastination, learn how to embrace it. 

By Jeroen Elsing
Ex-lawyer turned relationship coach