Ex-lawyer turned relationship coach

Give Up Chasing The Wrong Things

We waste lots of time in life going after the wrong things.

Like designing content for views and virality rather than sales and trust. Reading piles and piles of books rather than dissecting a couple and assimilating all the material. Or dating someone cool and important, rather than someone caring and reliable who makes you feel loved. 

These are examples of ego-driven goals. They might get you some oohs and aahs, but they don’t actually enrich your life. It’s all icing and no cake.

Something that we fall for all the time.

People often boast about the hours they work, but how many of these people actually have a life that you’d like to live? And lots of us are quick to say we have lots of friends, but how many of them would actually help you get out of a jam at two in the morning?

Odds are, not many.

Some of our braggadocious comments and glistening trophies actually do have merit. Although a college degree isn’t a good indicator of skill, it does help open certain doors. 

But many of the accolades we seek are empty of meaning or value and exist only to convince fools of how exceptional and awesome we are. 

Don’t let badges and the praise of others pull you away from what matters. Work to help others. Read books to learn. Exercise to feel good. Complain to make an impact. Argue to gain more understanding. Create art to touch hearts. Make friends to love. 

If it doesn’t enrich your life, the lives of your family, or the members of your community, why do it?

By Jeroen Elsing
Ex-lawyer turned relationship coach